Wedding Bells, Gunfire and Rock Legends
by cookiemunster
Summary: Spaced Mike and Marsha are getting married! How will their friends react? Who will be Maid of Honour? Will the Bridal car be a tank? Will Tim and Daisy EVER get together? Dedicated to Becky Spaced fan and fellow OW. NEW CHAPTER!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

The _Grange Hill_ theme tune blared out on the TV, as weak spring sunshine shone in through the flat's windows. Tim lay on the bean-bag, mouth slightly open as he dozed.

Colin the dog sat next to him on the floor, gnawing at a chew toy that Daisy had bought him to keep him entertained. So far, Tim and Daisy had had to remove it twice from his jaws to stop him swallowing it.

Daisy herself lay on the sofa, also dozing lightly, with her glasses knocked slightly sideways as she had fallen asleep after reaching page three of Tolstoy's epic _War and Peace_, a book that she kept meaning to read, but one that she always put of reading because she wanted to have the time to 'fully appreciate the vast scope of Tolstoy's conceptual style'.

Well that, and the fact there was always a juicy new chick-lit out, which Daisy would devour and then deride as something she could've written ten times better. Somehow, she just never got round to doing it.

Tim, Daisy and Colin lived happily in the flat together. It had been over two years since all 'that business' over Marsha selling the house, Sophie, Colin leaving, Daisy nearly buggering off but then staying.

Since then a few things had change. For a start, they had a sparkly new coffee maker, which Daisy didn't want to use because it 'looked pretty and might get messed up by coffee stains' and that Tim didn't want to use because he was scared it would highlight his ineptitude when it came to electrical devices. He had electrocuted himself on the toaster, after all, and toasters don't contain boiling water.

Also, Tim had a regular job as a graphic artist at Dark Star Comics, and drew a new installment of 'The Bear' every month. He'd built up a small but loyal fan base, who e mailed him constantly about who he liked best: Scully or Buffy. Tim had never been asked such a hard question.

Daisy still had dreams of being a freelance writer, but she also wrote articles for women's mags, and occasionally newspapers so she could still pay the rent.

Something had changed in their relationship as well. Rather than just treating each other as friends, they seemed to feel something deeper for each other.

However, neither one of them wanted to ruin their living situation by making a move and then messing up. So instead, they tried to ignore it. Just recently though Tim had begun to hide his true feelings for Daisy under a layer of moodiness. The reason he'd done that was Robin.

No, not that chirpy little bird that hangs about on Christmas Cards. Robin was a man. And not just any man. He was Daisy's new guy.

Tim couldn't believe it when she'd told him. He'd stared at her open mouthed.

"_Tim, I think we need to talk." Daisy said as they sat at the small table in the kitchen area._

"_Look, Daisy, if it's about me and Mike using your tampons as missiles and playing _

'_Bathroom War' with them, then I'm sorry, it wont happen again." said Tim, not looking up from his Spiderman comic .He picked up his mug of tea and took a gulp._

"_No, Tim, it's not about that this time. The thing is Tim… I've kind of, met someone." she blurted out._

_Tim spat out all his tea onto his first edition Spiderman Number 93. He didn't care at that moment (he would later though, as he desperately tried to dry the running ink using Daisy's hairdryer)_

"_What?" he asked. _

_Daisy had explained. She'd met Robin in a bar. He wasn't like other blokes. He was sensitive and wanted to be a writer too. He liked art and plays and poetry recitals. They'd been going out for sixth months._

_Tim had met him two weeks into his and Daisy's relationship. He hated the man on sight. He had the kind of foppish curly hair that most women thought was cute and Byronesque, but actually looked stupid and needed cutting. _

_He also spoke in this not-too-obviously condescending manner._

"_Oh… you draw cartoons Tim? How very cute." _

_Tim had imagined pulling out a chainsaw and slicing him up Leatherface style. Or maybe he'd hang the smarmy bastard from a meat hook first, watch him squirm a bit._

_Tim refused to believe that the real reason he hated the guy so much was because he had put his arm round Daisy in such an easy manner that it screamed to him 'MARRIED WITH BABY WITHIN TWO YEARS!'_

A sudden pair of screaming voices woke Tim and Daisy up from their Sunday morning dozing. They looked at each other, then up at the ceiling.

Another thing that had changed in the past two years was that Marsha, the lovely, alcoholic Rock-Queen landlord, and Mike, Tim's best friend, the sweet TA gun freak, had become lovers.

As unlikely as it seemed, Marsha and Mike were well suited. Mike's easy manner had allowed Marsha to let him into her heart as he was the kind of bloke who wouldn't run off with half her cash to the Costa del Sol with some nasty little tart he'd picked up in a Soho nightclub.

Mike found that Marsha was a fascinating lady, with an amazing life story. He was drawn to her as she was kind and looked good with a gun (he frequently let her handle his guns. If you know what I mean wink).

The two often went on walking holidays and to rock festivals. Mike loved walking and it kept Marsha's pins in shape. Marsha loved the atmosphere at festivals, and the music. And Mike would never pass up the opportunity to spend a weekend in a tent.

Tim and Daisy barely had time to react as the door to the flat swung open and Marsha and Mike beamed at them, obviously ecstatic.

"Are you to OK?" Tim feared that somehow, they'd found that 'bad speed' he kept meaning to throw away, but kept forgetting to, which he had hidden under his mattress, like he used to do with porn magazines when he was thirteen. Old habits die hard.

"WE'RE ENGAGED!' they both yelled at the tops of they're voices.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Wow, Marsha! I mean… wow! I mean, it's just great, I mean you and Mike getting married! You two! I mean, wow it's just great!" Daisy rambled on while Marsha stroked Colin's head and smiled beatifically.

"I know, kitten! I'm as surprised as anyone. One minute, I was looking for the telly remote, because I wanted to watch a bit of Kilroy, next thing I know, I find this ring box, down the side of the settee. Well, Mike wanders in, looking all panicky, sees me holding this box and he proposes just like that! He said he wanted to do it tonight, he was going to cook us a nice curry and we were going to watch MASH. But he said yesterday, after he'd been down the jewelers, he'd fallen asleep on the sofa, the ring had fallen out of his pocket, and he'd spent the best part of two days trying to find it again!" Marsha grinned happily.

Daisy smiled back at her friend, genuinely pleased for her. But there was something slightly odd about Marsha.

"Marsha! You aren't smoking! And you haven't had a drink since you got here! Over two hours ago!"

"I know, kitten! It's brilliant… I don't really need drink and booze now I've got Mike." Marsha said in her typical relaxed drawl.

"Wow, that's like, you've reached self actualisation!"

"Oh no love, I don't need to do that anymore, not now I've got Mike." replied Marsha.

"What… Oh no, that's um, not what it is. Self actualisation is when you realise that you don't need vices and other things, just knowing that you, in yourself, is all you truly need" said Daisy.

"Oh…. but that makes me sound like a right twat." said Marsha.

"Hmm well…. Oh my god! Marsha! I could make your wedding cake! It could be like, my present to you and to Mike! I could make like a three tiered, and each layer could be a different flavour, so there could be chocolate and fruit cake and Victoria sponge and all sorts! Oh, and it could be shaped like a fairy tale castle! It could have turrets fashioned out of…"

As Daisy rambled on, Marsha suddenly felt the need for a Lambert and Butler and a nice big glass of Rioccha.

Tim and Mike sat at the bar of the pub, enduring the awkward silence that had hung between them ever since ordering their pints of bitter.

There were so many things wanted to say. Why hadn't Mike told him about planning to propose to Marsha? Why hadn't he told him things were that serious? Why hadn't Mike offered him one of his crisps?

"Crisp?" said Mike, proffering the packet. They were cheese and onion. Tim could hardly say no.

"Thanks he said, taking a couple, and popping them in his mouth. As he chewed them, the noise of crunching only made the silence sound louder… if you see what I mean.

Mike cleared his throat and began to say what he'd been preparing in his mind.

"Look Tim, I never meant it to happen like this. It started out as a bit of fun, and before I knew it, I was falling into something, and I sure hoped it was love. I mean, things moved so fast. I would've told you earlier how serious things had gotten, but I never seemed to find the right time."

"So that's it is it? Suddenly I'm only Grand Moff Tarkin to Marsha's Vader in the world of your emotions?" Tim didn't mean to be so snippy. It was just the fact Mike was so happy, and he…. wasn't.

He knew he should be happy for them, he just felt like everyone had someone. Mike had always been a constant in his life, and suddenly he was engaged. And now Daisy had Robin… he felt like he was being deserted.

Mike was speechless for a moment before saying;

"Tim. You are my longest serving friend. When I stole that tank and nearly invaded Paris, you stood by me. You helped me to get back on my feet. Without your help I'd don't think I'd have got into the Caravan Club, yet alone the TA.

Don't you ever say you are second best in my emotions, Timothy. Marsha is the woman I love. But you Tim… you're my rock."

Tim looked at his friend, tears glistening in both their eyes.

"Oh, Mike! C'mere you big ape!"

They stood up to hug and embraced for a while before the landlord walked over and said to them.

"Look, lads, I don't mind that kind of thing, but the punters in here are a bit more of a sports crowd, know what I mean? If you could tone it down a touch, it'd be great."

Tim and Mike let go of each other and said 'yeah, sure, whatever' in their gruffest voices.

Tim smiled and quietly said to Mike "I'm really happy for you and Marsha." And he meant it.

His best friend deserved to find someone, even that someone was his alcoholic landlady. And if Mike was happy, Tim could find comfort in that. Just as long as he could punch Robin's face in every time he said that 'poetry is the true language of the articulated elite' Tim felt he could be happy forever.

"And of course Tim… you're my best man"

**Thanks to my reviewers! Really appreciate the support! Next chapter… The Return of Twist!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_DURRR!_

The buzzer to the flat rang out, startling Daisy. She'd been inking designs for Marsha and Mike's wedding cake onto the back of a Boots receipt. Marsha had gone up to her floor to have a 'little lie down'.

Daisy was also having a daydream about her own wedding. It was funny, she'd been dating Robin for sixth months, but the person she envisioned marrying didn't have his mop of curly brown hair. Instead he seemed more of a bleach blonde type… curious. Also Daisy didn't daydream about a traditional wedding day either.

Instead it was just her, and her partner, and their closest friends in a registry office. Nothing fancy, just… right. And then later she and Tim would have a massive party and … _Tim_? Where did his name pop up from?

Besides, she loved Robin. Or at least she thought she did. She liked how clever he was, and he could be very kind. And Tim had made it clear that he didn't care less who Daisy went out with. If his disinterested behaviour over the past few months showed her anything, it was that Tim obviously had never held any romantic notions towards her.

_DURRR!_

The buzzer rang again, this time it was accompanied by a banshee like, high pitched, and angry.

"I know you're in there Daisy Steiner! I don't care if you don't want to see me! I'm coming in, because I'm cold and hungry and there's a man in the street who keeps looking at me, and he smells funny and I think he may be wearing Brut, and you know I'm allergic!"

By this point, Daisy had already made it down the flight of stairs and flung the door open.

"Twist! It's great to see you! You look fabulous!"

"Daisy! Good to see you to… still not conditioning your hair I see." said Twist Morgan, casting a scrutinizing eye over her friend.

Daisy was wearing a pair of flared jeans, a pair of Tim's socks that didn't match and a blue t-shirt that said 'Hustle' on it. Her hair was loose and she was wearing a plastic beaded necklace.

Twist looked like a complete juxtaposition of Daisy. Her hair was up, in two 'messy' (but in actual fact, stylishly tousled) buns, on top of her head. Her make up was flawless, as was her pink dress and matching cardigan. She was wearing high heeled sandals, despite the chilly spring weather. And she carried with her three large pink suitcases and a small handbag (also… you guessed it, pink).

Twist swept past Daisy, into the hall and up the stairs.

"So much to tell! Honestly, life has been a complete whirlwind these last few months!" Twist turned as she reached the fifth step, to look back at Daisy.

"Oh darling, be a love and bring those up will you? I'm so tired from carrying them from the taxi…" That was a lie. She'd made the poor taxi driver carry them up the path for her, and she hadn't tipped him. Life is just so much easier for pretty girls.

Daisy looked at the suitcases, looming at her.

Just then, Tim and Mike wandered back up the path, back from the pub and their 'manly' chat.

"Alright, Daisy?" asked Tim, at his flatmate's slightly stricken expression.

"Yeah, Twist's here" she replied.

"Twist? She's back from filming porn films in New Mexico?" asked Tim.

"That was just a rumour. And yes, she is back, and I think she's staying with us. And she wants me to take her bags up for her." she gestured to the monolithic pile of suitcases on the doorstep.

"Well, Mike and I will help, wont we, Mike? Mike's specialist skill in the TA is heavy lifting." said Tim, like a proud Dad.

"Really?" asked Daisy.

"Yes, it seems all those years carrying injured rugby players off the pitch paid off." said Mike, a wistful glint in his eye.

"Oh, were you on a Rugby team?" asked Daisy

"No, no. Just a hobby of mine. Alright, Forward as One, people!" said Mike as he lifted a case and began to ascend the stairs.

Daisy and Tim both reached for the same case, and then both stepped back. They smiled, awkwardly, as Tim picked both up, and handed Daisy one.

"Here, this one's lighter." he said, smiling at her. She grinned back as she took the case, and promptly, fell into him, dragged down be the weight.

There was another awkward moment before Tim righted Daisy, as they stood there, almost hugging each other.

And then they both moved away, the spell broken. Tim attempted a joke to ease the odd atmosphere that enshrouded them both.

"I said it was lighter, not that it was full of air! I mean, it's Twist, she's probably got a

pair of shoes for everyday of the month in there!"

Daisy smiled. She would never know that the funny, heart flippy feeling in her chest was exactly the same feeling that Tim was hiding so well.

He looked at her for a moment as she picked up the dropped suitcase. She was his friend, she was clumsy and she made him laugh. Since when did she make him feel all… gooey on the inside? She was his friend… when did she become a girl? And not just any girl, the only girl that he was willing to carry heavy suitcases up the stairs for. It made no sense to Tim.

"C'mon, she'll probably want to change her outfit to match the décor." said Daisy, wryly.

**By the way 'Forward as One' is a phrase used by the Royal Infantry and does not belong to me. K?**

**Please review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello! Thank you so very much to all my reviewers, you are all amazing people and if it wasn't impossible, I would send you all some wedding cake! BTW, sorry it's been a while, I've been really busy this month.**

**Chapter 4 **

"Anyway, so that was what happened when I was in Corfu. Now when I finally made it to Portugal, I met Serge and well…"

Twist had been talking for 18 minutes and showed no sign of stopping. It didn't matter to her that Daisy had completely zoned out and Tim had long ago abandoned the kitchen, to grapple with Final Fantasy 7.Tim was planning to try and bring down _Shin Ra_ and then go and draw the latest installment of his comic series. Tim had matured a lot in the past two years.

Suddenly, the door of the flat swung open, and Brian Topp, stripped to the waist and covered in splotches of paint wandered in.

"I don't suppose you have some chamois leather?" he asked. He turned to Daisy and stopped when he saw his ex girlfriend sitting at the table with her.

"Oh, hello, Brian. Still painting I see?" asked Twist in a smug, cutesy voice.

Brian paused for a moment, as though collecting himself. And then he said ;

"Yes Twist, I am still painting. After you left, I seem to come into my own and now I'm being recognized in the art world. In fact, I have an installation at the Tate Modern in a few months."

Twist stared at him. Brian seemed a little taller, a little less sketchy. He seemed stronger as well, emotionally and physically.

Twist suddenly felt annoyed. She hated it when people changed for the better and she couldn't feel superior to them anymore. So she had to take the only logical option. Take the piss.

"Oh yes, I'm sure you 'came into your own' after I left. Tell me Brian have you…"

"Twist, I will no longer take your insecure digs at me to heart. You are no longer a part of my life; you are really only a vaguely unpleasant memory. Sometimes I think we could've been good together, but ultimately, you are just a stuck up little princess and well… I'm too good for you." said Brian.

Twist's face had frozen into a mask of complete horror, broken only when she let out a noise, which written phonetically went something like 'Pffgftunwahh' as she turned and ran into the small bathroom behind her.

Brian fell to the sofa as soon as the door slammed, reached for a cushion and held it to him for protection. He also began to do that rocking thing that he only did when he was nervous.

"Do you think she knew I'd been rehearsing that for two years?" he asked Tim.

"No… it seemed pretty spontaneous." Tim turned to look at Brian. "Well done mate"

Brian smiled. Then a thought struck him.

"Maybe I should apolo-"

"No!" yelled Daisy and Tim in unison.

Tim turned back to his game, as the anime computer characters bounced around the screen. Daisy got up and headed for her bedroom.

"Right, I'm going to get ready." she said as she wandered out of the room.

"Ready for what?" asked Tim.

"Robin's taking me out for a meal, it's our 3 month anniversary." she said.

"But… but Marsha and Mike asked us out for drinks, to celebrate!" complained Tim. He knew he was being unreasonable, but he didn't really care.

"Well I'm sorry Tim, but Mike and Marsha understand. They know Robin and I are going out tonight." said Daisy.

"I just thought your friends meant more to you than that." said Tim, then instantly regretted it.

"Oh really Tim? My friends don't mean anything to me? Well, that's a good one, coming from you. When was the last time you said anything nice to me? You've been a moody wanker all month. Honestly, it's like living with a teenager sometimes. I've a good mind to take up Robin's offer!" retorted Daisy.

"What offer?" asked Tim, forgetting his anger in apprehension.

"Robin's asked me to move in with him." replied Daisy, and then she turned on her heel and headed into her room.

Tim stared at her door long after it'd been shut.

"Robin's nice, isn't he?" said Brian.

Tim turned to look at him. Brian sensed, by the look on Tim's face, that he'd said the wrong thing.

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**That's why you had to come back online, Becky! Please review guys! **

**NB If you've never played it, _'Shin Ra'_ is a corporation in the Final Fantasy series. It's all evil and needs stopping. Unfortunately, I don't own Final Fantasy; it belongs to the nice people at Edios. Who I really hope won't sue me as they are so lovely. **


	5. Chapter 5

**I'M BACK, BABY!**

**Ahem **

**Apologies to start with. Sorry for making a mistake with the whole '3 month anniversary thing' it was meant to be 7 but I wrote three… please ignore it. **

**Also I got totally out - geeked (see reviews) cos apparently the Final Fantasy series is made by Squarenix… whatever, just don't sue me! (And it says Edios in the box… why can't these things be simple?) I'm also sorry for being away for so long… I know, I know. I apologize for diva-esque behaviour as well.**

**Thanks to everyone who sent PMs to me that basically said 'write more you lazy cow' and to reviewers… and especially to Becky, who I do love a lot. Obsession Whores Forever!**

** So without further ado….

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**

**Chapter 5**

Daisy was trying to have a nice time, she really was. The food was nice, as was the atmosphere, as was Robin. But something was clawing at the back of her mind. Well, not something as such… more like… someone.

She couldn't get the wounded look Tim had given her earlier that evening, when she'd announced that Robin had asked her to move in with him. He looked like a puppy that had been kicked and then thrown down a flight of stairs and then been forced onto an Andrex advert with Rik Mayal doing the voiceover. It'd made Daisy feel bad but also… something else. She didn't want to admit that the 'something else' was hope.

If Tim didn't want her to move in with Robin, maybe there was a chance, just a chance, that he felt something other than friendship for her. Or maybe he just didn't want the hassle of looking for a new flat mate. That seemed more likely. Tim was a lazy-

Robin cleared his throat loudly, and Daisy looked up with a start. He looked a bit pissed off.

"You're not really with me tonight, are you, sweetheart?" said Robin.

Daisy felt that 'sweetheart' grate on her nerves ever so slightly. She knew he only meant it as a term of endearment but it made Daisy feel patronized. Just like his 'darlings', 'honeys' and 'schnookums' (yes schnookums… shudder). But it was just one of Robin's little foibles and the rest of his personality really made up for it.

Robin leaned back and clicked his fingers at the waiter. "Garcon!" he called.

The young man, his longish hair tied back loosely in a ponytail ambled over.

"Yeah?" he asked, still chewing the spearmint gum that he'd had in his mouth since the start of the shift. Jaz, the waiter, wasn't in the mood for some posh twat and his unfortunate girlfriend to be calling him 'Boy' in French. Jaz was quite impressed with himself that he still remembered some of his GCSE French, but it didn't lighten his mood any. He'd rather be at home, writing his screenplay than here, swerving bouillon and pasta to middle class twerps.

"My girlfriend and I would like to order… are you chewing?" asked Robin in disgust.

Daisy felt a rather disconcerting flashback to her time in the fourth form at school and one particular stingy Algebra teacher had caught her with a gob full of Juicy Fruit.

"Er yeah, I'd like spaghetti bolognaise and a salad, please. And a Diet Coke to drink, thanks." she said, a little meekly to Jaz.

Jaz smiled at Daisy, and took down her order. He appreciated it when customers actually knew what they wanted and picked from the set menu... it just made life easier. He turned, with a heavy heart to 'Garcon Guy'.

"How rare is the rare steak? You see, it's my belief that one cannot fully appreciate the flavour and texture of the meat if it's too cooked…" Robin began rambling on.

Jaz rolled his eyes and then looked at Daisy, his eyebrows raised. Daisy accidentally caught Jaz's eye and had to stifle a giggle behind a napkin. Robin was in one of his 'I'm superior' moods. Daisy usually didn't mind, it just showed of Robin's superior taste and knowledge… although it did get a little irritating after a while.

Her mind was drawn back to Tim. Tim, who barley ordered anything as interesting as a cup of tea and a bacon sandwich when they went out to eat and would rather sit at home with a brew and some Jaffa Cakes than go to a poncey restaurant.

She picked up her bag.

"Excuse me a minute." she said to Robin and Jaz, who was still trying to explain to Robin that they actually didn't have any lobster that evening.

Daisy slipped into a cubicle in the restaurant's loos and dialed her home number on the small silver mobile she'd bought for 'business reasons'. Well that and playing Tetris on…

_Ring Ring…Ring Ring… **Click**_: '_Hey you've reached Tim and Daisy, we're not in, so call us back or leave a message or whatever byeeee… say something Tim! ( incomprehensible mumbling) yeah, bye'_

Daisy sighed when she heard her own voice followed by Tim's sullen 'yeah, bye' on the answering machine. Still, she could leave a message.

'Hi.. Tim Look… OK, uh, I'm sorry about earlier. I guess I was just, pissed off a bit, you know cos you were being you and I dunno.. I thought maybe… well it doesn't matter now. Anyway, I didn't mean what I said.. I hope you can, you know, forgive me! Love you. Oh, it's Daisy, by the way.' **_Click.

* * *

_**

Tim threw down his pencil in disgust. Everything he'd drawn that evening looked wrong. He wasn't inspired and he felt tired and old, somehow. He sighed and picked up his mug of tea and gulped down a half a gallon of the lukewarm liquid.

'_Fuck this' _he thought and threw his sketch pad, pencils and inks onto the floor and stomped out of the room.

Ten seconds later, he walked back into the room, picked his sketchpad up and put it on his desk, put the pencil back in the silver and black box that Daisy had bought him for his birthday and rearranged the inks into a workable order. Hey, art equipment's expensive, even on Tim's new found freelance wealth.

He knew, deep down, why he couldn't work. Every time he attempted to draw _The Bear_'s latest installment, all he could picture was Daisy's hurt, angry face. When he tried to think of the lines he wanted the characters to say all he could hear was '_Robin's asked me to move in with him_'.

That statement had nearly thrown him off his feet (well, it would have, if he hadn't already been sprawled out on a beanbag). He had never dreamed that Daisy was actually going to live with the pompous arse. He figured that Daisy would one day open her eyes, see Robin for the twattish Hugh Grant look-alike he was and dump him. Then she'd… find Tim.

Tim sighed. It looked like that wasn't going to happen now. And staying in the flat was driving him insane. He was going to go upstairs, get Mike and take him out for a pre-stag night stag night. Well, they needed to get some practice in anyway.

Tim had already slammed and locked the door to the flat when the phone rang and the answering machine clicked on…

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**Reveiws always appreciated!**


	6. Chapter 6

**They are at their pub! The one they are in for all the episodes. I love that pub, especially when Tim tries to put his arms up on the railings then fails dramatically. **

**Imagine the pint slamming down with an Edgar Wright 'whoosh bang!' on it.Also, Hog Lumps. Well how could I not? The pool scene as well, imagine sound effects. I think Edgar Wright makes Spaced what Spaced is (along with Simon, Jess, Nick…. everyone else!). But thank you so much for saying my characterizations are good! I try and make them say things I can imagine them saying, and if I think 'Nah, they would never say that' then I take it out… such a lengthy process. **

**Thank you to the reviewers! Have some Jaffa Cakes opens box and finds it empty ummm… sorry ; )

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**

**Chapter 6**

Tim slammed his pint down on the table and moodily ripped open a bag of Hog Lumps, shoved some in his mouth and chewed them sullenly.

Not that anyone else on the table noticed. When Tim had suggested to Mike that they go out for a pint, he hadn't expected Mike to invite Marsha, who in turn invited Twist (they'd got pally when Twist said she knew someone who knew someone who worked in a shop next to Alexander McQueen's and could possibly get her a knock down wedding dress). Twist in turn wandered down stairs to do some hair flicking at Brian.

So now instead of just Mike and Tim it was Mike and Marsha and Brian and Twist. And Tim.

Not that Brian and Twist were back together, but the amount of flirting and hair fiddling that Twist was doing suggested that Brian being a successful artist with enough cash to afford a new pair of un-paint splattered trousers was definitely a sign that they could some day possibly maybe get back together. And sadly, Brian seemed to be falling for it hooks, line and sinker.

Mike and Marsha were only slightly less sickening because they were actually in love. They were cooing over a gun catalogue as if it was a Mothercare brochure and they were expecting their first child.

"Awww look at that holster! You can have your name appliquéd on with rhinestones!" said Marsha, smiling up at Mike.

"Certainly is a fine piece of kit" agreed Mike looking slightly misty eyed.

It wasn't that Tim wasn't happy for them, he really was. He was just … well jealous.

Tim stood up. "Anyone fancy a game of pool?"

He was met with surprised silence as the other four people had been having two very nice conversations.

Then a hand slammed down on Tim's shoulder. Tim looked at the hand, neat nails (hint of a manicure maybe?) and followed the arm. God, it would have to be Robin wouldn't it?

"I'll give you a game Tim…" the foppish twat practically sneered in his face.

"Where's Daisy?" asked Tim, because wherever Robin went, Daisy was sure to follow. He tried to shake Robin's arm off, but the guy seemed to have an iron grip.

"I'm here!" she said, walking over from the bar carrying a diet Coke and Vodka in one hand and a pint of some rather weak looking lager in the other.

"Oh you came!" said Twist. "You got my text then?"

"Ah yeah, just as we were leaving the restaurant." said Daisy, looking at Robin quickly. He and Tim were eyeing each other like dogs who were about to fight over a piece of meat. (Considering it was Daisy they were fighting over, it was quite a sexist and offensive simile to use. But it works)

"Oh, nice meal was it?" asked Twist.

"Ummmm…."

_Begin Flashback To Restaurant…_

Daisy walked back from the toilets feeling a lot calmer than she had done before. She hoped Tim got her message.

However, things in the restaurant had gotten a lot worse…

"This is not 'rare steak!' Rare steak should be pink! This is dull grey!" Robin was actually yelling at Jaz.

Jaz, for his part, was handling it well. In that he just looked like he wasn't bothered. The only noticeable difference to his body language was that his chewing had increased slightly.

"Look mate you want rare steak, fuck off down Gordon Ramsey's" deadpanned Jaz, and got an ovation from the rest of the diners, much to Daisy's burning shame.

And that's when Robin had grabbed a breadstick….

_End Flashback_

"Yes, it was lovely wasn't it darling?" said Robin keeping steady eye contact with Tim.

"Y-yes" Daisy replied, and then sat down quickly.

"Right, we going for a game then Tim?" asked Robin.

"Ready when you are…" said Tim. Was it just him or did Robin have crumbs in his eyebrows?

Tim looked over at Daisy. She looked nice, she had a green shirt on. He liked that green shirt on her it brought out the colour in her eyes. He forgot that he was meant to be mad at her, until Robin put his arm round her and said 'See you in a minute'

"Play nice!" said Daisy. From the look on Tim's face Robin would be lucky if he didn't get a pool cue broken over his head. The two men headed off to the pool tables on the other side of the room.

Tim set about racking up the balls, Robin fetched the cues.

"I'm stripes" said Robin.

"_You're a twat"_ thought Tim. So it was a lame mental comeback, but it still made him smile to himself.

"So you and Daisy must've had a nice time…" began Tim as Robin began to take his shot.

"Oh yes we did. But then we always do." he potted the ball.

Tim raised his eyebrows slightly and Robin lined up for his next shot. "You've got crumbs on your jacket…" Tim began just as Robin had nudged his cue towards the ball.

"You made me miss!" Robin whined.

"Oh sorry…" said Tim, but he wasn't. Robin began dusting down his jacket, moaning about waiters not respecting Pierre Cardin.

Tim smirked and lined up his shot, potting the ball before Robin had even stopped swiping at his blazer.

"Looks like we're even then, Bisley… " said Robin under his breath.

Daisy was trying to concentrate on what Marsha was saying, but her eyes kept straying back to Tim and Robin's game. Neither of them seemed to be having fun until one of them lost the play, when the other one's lips twisted into a cruel smile. She was actually surprised that they hadn't had a mock lightsabre duel with the cues yet.

"So I was thinking either brown or black taffeta for the bridesmaids dresses…. kitten?" asked Marsha.

Daisy snapped back into the conversation. "Ummm yeah! That'd be great."

"Or you could go for these chiffon and lace numbers, a little pricier but you can't put a price on good taste, it'd really create a floaty, light effect …" said Mike and was suddenly aware that everyone was the table was looking at him.

"Or you could y'know… wear jumpers or something… anyone want another drink?" he said.

"Yes" said everyone simultaneously, so Mike got up and headed for the bar, dropping a kiss on Marsha's cheek as he left.

For some reason, Daisy felt a little stab of jealousy as Mike did that. His and Marsha's easy affection was something she longed for with Robin, but sometimes it just felt like she was having a battle with wits with him all the time. She just wanted something nice and comfortable, something familiar… her eyes drifted back to Tim, who was still looking like a bull who'd been whacked around the face with a soggy red dishcloth in the middle of a Manchester United Red Devils football game, on a Red Letter day.

There were 3 balls left on the tale and Robin needed to pot one to win, while Tim needed two. Robin lined his shot up.

"So… had any work recently?" asked Tim, and Robin's shot faltered.

"I've been busy researching for my novel." said Robin, tersely.

"Ah I see." Tim said, taking his shot and potting the ball.

They were now even. Tim smiled '_Watch this you posh fop_' as he readied his winning line of shot.

"I guess you're still drawing your cartoons then?" asked Robin, but Tim managed to hold his shot as he said it.

"Graphic novels. And yes, I am." he smiled.

"And still skateboarding?" asked Robin again. Again, Tim managed to hold his shot.

"Yep it's good exercise, cheap transport."

"Hm." said Robin, trying to figure out a way to piss Tim off. Then he landed on it.

"I think you'll need to congratulate me soon you know Tim…" Robin began.

Tim had had quite enough of Robin's tricks (that had originally been his idea but he never used them nastily… well maybe he did, but at least he did it with style)

"Oh yeah… why's that?" Tim asked, as he took a few practice nudges with his cue towards the ball.

"I'm going to ask Daisy to marry me."

Tim's cue lunged forward, knocking the ball forward so it bounced harmlessly off the pocket.

"What?" asked Tim, his voice a quiet whisper as shock and panic flooded through him.

"Oh yes…" Robin lined it up and took his shot. The ball curved into the pocket and the game was over.

"I believe I've won." said Robin, to Tim's still catatonic features.

* * *

Dun dun durrrrrn! Please reveiw! 


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks to all the lovely reveiwers! This is for everone who is doing/has done/ is just about to do exams! I've just finished my ASs! Woooo! Love you all, have some Twiglets on me. But dont get violent.. By the way, Hoth is a planet in _Empire Strikes Back_** **and it's basically an Arctic world, if you've never seen it. (shame on you if you haven't... :) just kidding)**

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"Well what I don't understand is why women are expected to take men's names when they get married!" Twist was saying.

"That's an unusually feminist stance you're taking there, Twist" said Daisy.

"Well, I'd hate to end up with an ugly second name."

"Ah." replied Daisy and raised her eyebrows at Brian in an 'I take it back.' kind of way.

"Well I reckon I'm going to be Marsha Watt." said Marsha, smiling at Mike.

"It's better than Marsha 'Who'" joked Robin, who had just walked back to the table.

Tim, who stood glaring at his back, was furious when everyone laughed at the piss poor joke.

"Doctor Who would think it was a good surname." mumbled Tim moodily.

"Yes, well Doctor Who isn't real Tim." replied Robin in a voice that most people reserve for talking to five year olds.

Tim turned towards the bar and mumbled under his breath "Well if he was he wouldn't let you in the TARDIS, prick." Tim headed around the corner out of the view of the main table.

Mike looked at Robin's smug face and Tim's defeated retreat from the table and he instantly felt his protective hackles rise.

"Just going to talk to Tim, Marsha…" he said and got up. As he passed Robin, and if the latter had been listening properly, he would've heard a low growl emitting from the TA man. As it was Robin just assumed Mike was baring his teeth in a smile.

Mike walked to his friend who was no perched on a bar stool designed for a slightly taller man, looking like he was going to cry. And of course, Mike had to ask the only question that really doesn't help in that situation but all English people have to say when someone is clearly upset:

"You alright, mate?"

"Yeah… I…" Tim could actually feel tears welling in his eyes.

"What?" asked Mike, moving over to put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"I… I… I lost the bloody pool game!" Tim was infinitely grateful that no-one at the table could see him throw his arms round Mike's neck.

"What is it? I mean, what is it _really_?" asked Mike.

"Robin… he said... he said…" Tim began.

"Now come on, tell me what he said." Mike sounded alarmingly like a primary school teacher who had come across a sobbing child.

"He said that he was going to ask D-Daisy to.. m-marry him!" Tim wailed into Mike's shoulder.

"Aww… look whatever he's done to you, we can fix, OK? I'll always be with you… You know that, yeah?" Mike said to his friend.

As fate would have it, Tim and Mike's touching discussion took place just as the barkeeper, who earlier that day had told Mike and Tim to 'tone down the gay stuff' walked by. He raised his eyebrows at Mike but said nothing.

"Come on, we better go back to the table, Marsha'll be trying to pick us out some tuxedos." said Mike.

"Huh?" asked Tim wiping his eyes.

"You know for the wedding.." said Mike. Then as he watched his best friend's bottom lip begin to tremble, "MY wedding" he clarified.

Clamping an arm round Tim's shoulder for support, Mike steered him back towards the table.

"I could do the flowers." Brian was saying. Everyone looked at him in astonishment.

"Really?" asked Twist.

"Well yes. I was thinking maybe I could make them out of Perspex and then backlight them…"

"Have you chosen a church yet Marsha?" asked Daisy quickly steering the subject away from plastic flowers and 'backlighting' whatever the hell that meant.

"Well I don't think me and Mike are suited to a church… are we love?" called Marsha to Mike he was setting Tim down in a seat next to Brian, across from Robin and Daisy (who were holding each other's hands in a way that made Tim want to stab Robin's eyes in with cocktail sticks.)

"Are we what?" asked Mike, sitting down in the spare seat between Tim and Marsh.

"I was just saying, a church wedding isn't quite us."

"Nah, besides, I'm not allowed in quite a few Church of England Churches." said Mike "Got banned after that incident. You remember Tim, when I tried to use the pulpit as a sniper's box that time we visited Saint Antohny's on our ghost hunt? And I thought that vicar was an undercover spy? But he was actually just a vicar?"

Tim wasn't really listening. He was imagining slicing all the skin off Robin's head then throwing a jar of salt on him…

"Can the Church actually ban you?" asked Daisy.

"Well no. But they gave me a real talking to and I had to pay for 300 new candles and damages to the bell ropes… still it was a fun weekend." He smiled at the memory.

"I think we'll think on it more in the morning. I'm knackered." said Marsha, with a yawn.

"Yes I better get back and finish that still life I was painting…" said Brian, getting up with Marsha and Mike.

"I'd love to come and see that Brian!" said Twist, flicking her hair.

"Bye then." said Tim. His voice could've caused a chill on Hoth.

Mike squeezed Tim's shoulder. "Come on mate…"

"I want to talk to Daisy." Tim hissed through his teeth.

Mike nodded, took Marsha's hand and left with Twist and Brian in tow. Robin smiled at Tim.

"Not still mad about or pool game then?" asked Robin.

Tim narrowed his eyes at him. "Daisy… can I talk to you?" he asked her.

Daisy was a little confused.

"We can talk at home Tim…" she replied.

"Oh yeah, course you can if you weren't moving in with lover-boy there!" Tim's temper, fuelled with the alcohol that was pumping through his blood stream had bubbled over.

"Tim, didn't you get my mess-" Daisy began, only to be cut off by Robin.

"Who the hell do you think you are, talking to my girlfriend like that?"

"She doesn't belong to you!" said Tim indignantly.

"Well she was never yours..." said Robin, with a curl of his lip.

"Stop it! Both of you!" Daisy said, looking from Tim to Robin. Robin looked smug and Tim looked furious. She wasn't sure which expression bothered her more… her smug boyfriend other angry friend, both were pretty annoying.

"You know what, I'm going to leave." said Tim, standing up and scraping his chair back.

"I think it's best you do that Tim, you're embarrassing yourself." said Robin, coolly.

"No I'm not!" Tim turned angrily on his heal and then bashed into the table, knocking his half filled pint glass all over his trousers.

Robin stifled a laugh and Daisy through him a look of utter contempt.

"Tim I-" she began again.

"God, I don't want to hear it! If you want to hang around with this wanker, fine! Just don't expect me to watch you!"

Tim began making for the door.

"Bye Tim!" called out Robin, his voice incredibly fake.

"Oh… go kiss a bear!" yelled Tim.

Daisy watched him leave. She hoped he wasn't too mad at her. She couldn't stand it if this was 'it' for her and Tim.

Robin cracked his knuckles.

"Another drink?" he asked.

She resisted the urge to punch him. Just.

* * *

Tim flopped down on the sofa. He balled his fists and pressed his face again them. 

Colin began barking at the answering machine and Tim turned his head to see the little orange light flashing away.

With some trepidation, he reached over and pressed the button.

_BEEP! 'You have One new message, left today at 19:58 PM' _said the computer woman, whom Tim always thought sounded a little like Lara Croft. Suddenly, Daisy's voice filled the room.

_**Click**_'Hi.. Tim Look… OK, uh, I'm sorry about earlier. I guess I was just, pissed off a bit, you know cos you were being you and I dunno.. I thought maybe… well it doesn't matter now. Anyway, I didn't mean what I said.. I hope you can, you know forgive me! Love you. Oh it's Daisy by the way.' _**Click.**_

"Shit" said Tim to the empty room.

* * *

**Well?**


	8. Chapter 8

**Fans of the Peggster ****may enjoy the_ 'BofB_' reference… the jewelers name is a little reference too… but to Who? Ahahaha… that's right, I'm a massive geek. But not a nerd because that's just a 'speccy idiot'.**

**Sorry it's been a while, I had a heavy work load summer. But now I'm back at school (final year!) and working hard I cantake a break... if that makes sense! Thanks for your patience!**

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**Chapter 8**

"What do you think of… a gazebo?" asked Marsha.

"A what?" asked Mike, picking up another toast soldier and marching him over to the boiled egg in the camouflage egg cup saying 'Left Right, Left Right' under his breath.

"You know, like a big tent… in the garden! We could get married in one of them!" she exclaimed, warming to the idea.

They were sat at the breakfast table in their comfortable top floor flat, Mike in a khaki t shirt and green boxers, Marsha in her purple silky night gown, her long hair twisted into a plat over one shoulder.

"You might be on to something there, my lady love. I could probably get an Army Surplus tent from the Gulf war! I'm sure it'd be fine if we got all the sand out of it…"

"Uh well I…"

"I was joking! It doesn't matter where we get married, we could get married in the shed and I wouldn't care at all, just as long as we became man and wife." he grinned at her before yelling 'AT-TEN-TION!' and chewed the head off his eggy soldier.

Marsha smiled and knew he was right. "Still, it would be nice to get married in the garden, wouldn't it? I mean, a church wouldn't suit us and there's space…"

"I think it's a great plan." grinned Mike.

"Of course, you'll have to take your assault course down" Marsha reasoned, referring to the ten foot wall with crisscrossing rope attached (allowing for foot purchase), the three foot deep water filled trench (which would, Mike promised, eventually come part of Marsha's Feng Shui garden) and the tire track (which Colin could now do in 8.32 seconds).

Mike nodded, knowing that Tim would probably be the most upset about the loss (they often played '_Band of Brothers_' on a Saturday afternoon).

"I'll get on it this afternoon, I just need to wake up a bit first." conceded Mike.

"Oh so you don't fancy a little… Sunday morning exercise?" asked Marsha coyly.

A slow smile passed across Mike's face.

"Oh, go on then…" he whispered in anticipation.

"Great! You get the yoga mats I'll put the DVD on… do you want 'Cher's _Thighs-er-rific_' or 'Jane Fonda's _Totally Torso Work Out'_? asked Marsha, perfectly innocently. "Need to start exercising to get into this wedding dress!"

Mike sighed, and reached for his pink sweatbands. The he grinned ruefully and said "I fancy a bit of Fonda today!"

* * *

"I have to go home and see if Tim's OK" insisted Daisy for what felt like the eightieth time. 

She'd spent the night at Robin's. It had been a nice night but now she had her friend and her dog to think about. She hated to think of them, all alone in the flat. Neither of them would be doing anything constructive as Tim had just bought Max Paine 2 for PS2 and Colin had taken to napping on the sofa all day. She was surprised every time she walked into the living room that Colin wasn't also wearing a small 'Chocolate' beanie hat and smoking a joint, he was getting so much like Tim.

Robin sighed. "You can stay for breakfast, surely?"

"I'd rather go and check on him now and take Colin for a walk…." she saw Robin's expression get a lot darker when she mentioned Colin.

The pair of them had a mutual dislike of each other, Colin hated Robin because he wasn't like Tim and never scratched him behind the ears and Robin wasn't fond of Colin because he malted onto one of his expensive jackets.

Daisy sighed and pulled her scuffed brown boots on, pushing some of her hair out of her eyes.

"Look, I know you don't like Colin… or Tim, much, for that matter. But I do and I live with them and I… care about them a lot. So I wasn't to go and see them, OK?" she said, annoyed at Robin for some reason.

Probably the insolent way he was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, acting like she was making the biggest mistake in the world not staying to have breakfast with him.

"I'll come over later, OK?" she said, trying to placate him. She was just pulling on her coat and grabbing her bag.

He smiled at her and pulled her in for a deep passionate kiss. She resisted the urge to glance at her watch.

"Make sure you do, I'll miss you!" he said. She smiled and headed for the door.

"Bye." she said, glancing back for a second before shutting the flat door behind her.

Robin grinned to himself. She'd be back alright…. what did that Tim character have to offer? He was just a silly man-child who drew comics and wore stupid hats. And that dog… he'd seen better looking rats.

Still, it wasn't like daisy would be hanging around with them much longer. He picked up the London Yellow Pages and flicked through the pages until he found the page he wanted. He skimmed the adverts until he found the one that grabbed his attention:

_Joan Redfern, Jewelers_-

* * *

Brian awoke, the sun streaming through his window. The spring was soon changing to summer and the birds were chirping their heads off to celebrate it. He grinned and pulled the bed clothes away, grabbing some clothes and shoving them on. 

He was looking forward to a day of painting, just him, the canvass and his vast imagination. He was surprised that he didn't have a hangover. He felt particularly clear headed and pleased with himself because he'd managed to fend of Twist's advances the night before.

That was when something stopped him in his tracks. There seemed to be a rather large amount of pink clothing strewn on his bedroom floor…

'_Oh god, tell me I didn't…'_ Brian thought desperately…

In walked Twist, wearing one of his paint spattered t-shirts and a big smile on her face.

"Morning sweetie!" she beamed at Brian.

Brian couldn't think of anything to say. After some deliberation he settled on 'Hnyyhgunfgh' .

* * *

Tim moved over to Daisy and took her head in his hands, lifting her face up to his... 

"No Tim, we can't!" she insisted, but she didn't move away from him.

"Why, because you have a boyfriend? Because the whole world thinks that it's wrong? Well I say, world be damned, if this isn't right, nothing is!" Tim said, holding one hand in the air impassioned.

"No Tim, actually it's because your alarm is about to go off…"

BUZZ

Tim awoke, bleary and confused, still wearing his hat (but oddly, not his trousers) on his bed, beads of sweat dripping down his forehead (probably because of the hat). He was extremely unsettled by the dream, as the shaky remnants of last night began to fill his mind.

Robin's smug face… marriage…. answering machine message… 'Shit'… vodka…full bottle… half full… floor… Colin licking face…stumble to room…

"Aww crap." Tim said quietly. He'd not only made a fool of himself and yelled at Daisy, he'd also managed to drink half a bottle of Russia's (or Netto's) finest and given himself the Big Massive Painy Cloud of Hangover Land.

He knew, as with most British based ailments, that the only answer was tea. Tea in copious amounts, with only a dash of milk and the tiniest smidgen of sugar. Tea so strong that you could use it to stick Airfix Model kits together. Tea without limits.

The only probably was that to get to the tea, he first had to get up and fill the kettle, locate the tea bags and produce some milk (or buy some… he wasn't about to milk Colin. Besides, it hadn't worked the last time.)

He shuffled out of bed and into the living room. A glance into Daisy's room revealed an un-slept in bed. The smell of her shampoo and perfume mingled with the smell of typewriter ink in her small room. He shuffled out again. After the way he'd behaved he would be lucky if she ever spoke to him again.

He sighed. He couldn't believe what a fool he'd been, yelling at Robin, the insufferable wanker like that and then yelling at Daisy, who didn't deserve it at all…

He filled the kettle with water and glanced around the flat. He couldn't bear the thought of living there alone, of it just being his stuff cluttering the place up. He didn't want there to be just the one Scooby Doo action figure standing on the small table by the door. He didn't want to get those horrible mail order catalogues that advertise nose hair clippers and fiber optic Christmas Trees through the post and not have anyone to laugh at them with. He didn't want to be without Daisy.

As if she'd read his mind the flat door opened and Daisy, windswept and slightly disheveled walked into the flat. They stared at each other for a quiet moment as if neither of them could decide which one was more likely to make the first move. Eventually, it was Daisy who spoke first.

"Why are you wearing your hat but no trousers?" she asked.

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Please Reveiw! 


	9. Chapter 9

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**Chapter 9**

"Ohh, Daisy, there you are!" called Marsha, bursting through the doorway to the flat. "You ready darling?" she asked.

"Uh… ready?" Daisy queried in a confused voice.

"We're going dress shopping, I told you last night in the pub! Honestly love, you're on another world these…. Tim, why are you wearing a hat but no trousers?"

Just then, Mike wandered in, humming.

"Hello, cadets… sweetheart", he said waving at everyone then dropping a kiss on Marsha's cheek. "I'm just heading out to check out gazebos and ministers… Tim, why are you wearing a hat but no trousers?"

Just as Tim was about to explain they all heard a howling noise from downstairs, followed by a shrill yell and some crashes, and then feet pounding on the stairs.

Then Brian burst in, distraught "Oh god…" he sounded like the old, self conscious Brian again "I've done something really stu- ...Tim why are you wearing a hat but no trousers?"

Suddenly Daisy reacted.

"Tim, why don't you go and put some trousers on, Marsha I will meet you downstairs in ten minutes, I just need to get changed, Brain will talk about your stupidity later on and Mike, good luck with the gazebo ministers but do you think you could all get out of here for a moment because Tim and I need to talk."

(Only the way she said it, it didn't have the commas. I just put them in so you wouldn't get confused.)

The others were so taken aback that they all said their respective goodbyes, see you laters and in Brian's case 'nnngghh' s and left closing the flat door behind them. Leaving Tim and Daisy alone.

A weird silence ensued, until both of them decided to talk at the same time.

"I'll just go and-" said Tim pointing at his room.

"I'll just make some -' said Daisy pointing at the kettle.

"Tea" said Tim.

"Trousers" finished Daisy.

They smiled at each other, a genuine smile, the first one they had shared in a while. Both of them felt strange warmth from it. Then they both remembered themselves and went about their business.

Tim shuffled off and pushed his door to, and then leant against it, his chest heaving. So he'd just been seen by the majority of his house mates in his underwear… but all he could think about was how Daisy had looked wandering into the flat just a few minutes ago.

Daisy poured fresh tea into two mugs, just as Tim walked into the kitchen. She looked up and they grinned at each other. He'd put on a nice shirt and taken his hat off. He even looked like he'd combed his hair.She'd taken her coat off and slung it on a chair. They sat down opposite from each other at the small table. Daisy passed him a mug of tea.

"Thanks" he said.

They sipped quietly for a few moments, savouring the hot drink and munching on the small plate of biscuits Daisy had put onut.

"Look, Tim…" Daisy began and then wondered where she was going with it.

"Dais, I'm really sorry about… last night. I hadn't got your message… and I know that's not really an excuse for behaving.. like a …'

"Twat?" she suggested, helpfully.

"Yeah, like a twat." he said. Then he smiled at her again. "It's just that… Robin… is also… a twat."

Daisy stifled the urge to agree with him. Instead she sighed and stood up, to get some more biscuits from the cupboard.

"You two would get on fine if you just gave each other a chance" she said, swinging the cupboard open, grabbing the Jaffa Cakes (OK fine, they aren't technically a biscuit, get off my back!). Only she shut the cupboard a little to violently and ended up trapping one of her fingers.

"Oww" she whined, clutching her hand.

Tim jumped up, concerned. He took her hand in his and began to massage it. "You silly pickle"

"Stop that! My hands are all crumby!" Daisy insisted.

"My hands are crumby too… what are you afraid of?" Tim asked, fixing her with a piercing look.

"Afraid?" asked Daisy.

"You're trembling" he grinned, still holding her hand.

"I am not trembling"

Daisy felt herself be drawn closer to Tim... it was so weird, yet right.

"I think you like me because I'm a twat… I don't think you've had enough twats in your life…Well… none quite like me, anyway…"

"Tim… do you think maybe we've taken the Empire Strikes back reference too far?" asked Daisy, as his lips neared hers.

"I'd like to take it just a little further, if you don't mind" he said. And then he paused for a second.

"Tim?" asked Daisy.

"What?" asked Tim.

"You're not… _waiting for me to say the line_ are you?" she asked.

"Well, is that really so ha-"

Daisy leaned forward and kissed him. And Tim forgot all about Star Wars. Well.. for about two minutes, anyway.

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	10. Chapter 10

**It's nice to be back. Thank you to everyone who reviewed, I love you all. In a friendly way, not in the way that I'll come round your house and steal your underwear and put it on a pillow and sleep with it at night…. I only do that if I **_**really**_** love you… This chapter has a title. It will fill you with fear.**

**Chapter 10- The Boyfriend Strikes Back**

Of course, it was bound to happen; it was inevitable as the waxing of the moon, the changing of the tide, the presenting of yet another Channel Four '100 Greatest Toenail Clippings' presented by Jimmy Carr. What happened next to was also inevitable. As inevitable as the wick in a candle burning down or…. that I would run out of things that are inevitable.

Twist burst into the flat, with a wail like a bloodhound that had got its face stuck under an anvil, just as Tim and Daisy drew apart. To say that Tim felt let down by the way Daisy wouldn't meet his gaze and moved away from him really quickly, like he was on fire or something. Which he was, in a way. He couldn't believe how bad Twist's CP30 style timing was.

"What's up Twist?" Daisy said, a little too brightly, her voice shaking a bit.

"B-Bw-Bw-awahhhhn!" Twist sobbed into the cushion as she lay prostrate on the sofa.

"… Brahman?" asked Daisy, kneeling down next to her comatose friend. Well it wasn't too fair out of the realms of possibility that Twist could be having a fit over the concept of Hindu spirituality. Well actually it was.

"Bri-ahhhhnnnnwuh!' yelled Twist, a little more coherently.

"Ah" said Daisy, and glanced over at Tim and then regretted it. He looked like he'd trapped his balls in the fridge door. With one, final, penetrating glare, he grabbed his wallet and stomped out of the flat.

Twist, of course, didn't notice the emotional turmoil and massive sexual tension between Daisy and Tim, because she was still of the rather egocentric idea that only she could have problems of the heart.

"He-ghe- s-s-SLEPT with me and-uh then he was gone this mo-orn-ning!" she whined. She wasn't very attractive when she was crying, especially with large amounts of snot and phlegm seemed to be making her speech more difficult to understand than usual.

Daisy patted her back. "He's probably just gone out to get some milk." she said comfortingly as Twist wept harder into the now moist cushion. _"And a ticket to Helsinki if he's got any sense_" she added silently in her head.

Still comforting Twist was a lot easier than what Daisy knew she had to do. It would probably be a few hours before Tim came back from his huff induced walk. He'd taken his wallet so he'd definitely head to GAME or GAMERS or BIG GAME or _Mr. T. Harrison's Computer Program Emporium_ to see if there were any knew releases that he hadn't read about on the internet (fat chance. That man had every single forum on constant refresh for any news on Fantastic Fantasy No. 9821)

Daisy sighed. She was not looking forward to his return.

* * *

Tim stormed off down the street, not quite sure where he was going, but wherever he was heading he was going to get there fast, because he was walking in its general direction pretty darn quickly.

"Tim!" yelled a voice from behind him, and for one fleeting, heart-leaping-into-mouth moment, Tim dared to hope it was Daisy calling him. Then he recognized that the voice was masculine, and came with a large man wearing a beret, camouflage gear, a pair of orange-lensed sunglasses and a rather fetching moustache attached to it.

His oldest friend was barreling down the street towards him and for just one, brief second, Tim's heart sank. He actually didn't want to see anyone at that moment. Then Mike threw his arms around him and knocked him to the ground.

"Get Down! ENEMY FIRE!" screamed Mike into Tim's ears, pointlessly because Tim was already sprawled out on the pavement with a heavy man laid on top of him, rendering it impossible for Tim to be anything but down.

After about ten seconds, things got awkward when the only noises to be heard were not the artillery of a rival army, but a car driving past and a few kids across the road guffawing and going 'Haha that is like, well gay'. Naturally these children were no more than ten years old, they were all on BMX s and they generally hung out on that street most days, spitting and chewing and being unpleasant. It was their job, or at least it would be if them having a job didn't constitute child labour.

"Mike?" asked Tim, after a few more seconds had passed.

"Yes, Tim?"

"I don't think we are actually under siege." Tim said, dryly.

"Oh yeah!" Mike said, getting to his feet, as if he'd suddenly remembered that he was lying on another man on a London pavement, in full view of, well, normal people.

Tim, with his torso extremely relieved there was no longer 16 stone of man mass on top of it, dragged himself gratefully back to a standing position.

"So…?" asked Tim, as they began to walk down the street.

"I went on a new TA course, of dealing with the potential of hostile fire in pedestrianised areas."

"Cool" said Tim, who actually was impressed.

"Yep, it requires loads of skills, like running and jumping on people, weapon handling and second to one map skills, sense of direction and navigation." Mike said proudly.

"Awesome." Tim replied. Then a thought struck him. "You left about ten minutes ago to buy a gazebo didn't you?"

"Ah yeah. I got lost on the way to the bus stop."

"Oh."

They walked on a few minutes in companionable silence, Mike cheerfully whistling a little under his breath. Of course, he was whistling the theme tune to 'The Dam Busters' but you can't have everything.

"Mike?" Tim began, after a deep breath.

"Yes, Timmy?" said Mike, agreeably.

"I … I kissed Daisy." Tim waited. He waited for Mike to say '_But she's got a boyfriend_' or '_You're no better than Dwayne_' or '_You're a disgrace to this family_'. Well maybe not the last one, because frankly, that'd be weird.

Instead, Mike said "Well about time too!"

"I know I feel bad but- what?" Tim stopped, perplexed.

"Oh come on Tim? How long have you two been in love?"

"We aren't… we're not… we can't be in love!"

"Why not?"

"Because that's… because it's… it's all… gay!" said Tim, grabbing for the lowest form of playground insult available.

Mike eyed Tim. "You love her. And you're scared because you think you are going to loose her. But in a couple of hours you are going to go back to that flat and you well tell her EXACTLY how you feel. Do you understand my command, soldier?" Mike's voice had taken on the cold decisive tone of an army Major.

"Yes sir!" barked Tim, because it was the only logical response.

They continued their walk down the street. "Why in a couple of hours, Mike?" asked Tim, after a brief interval, in which the audience could go and get a top up of popcorn or a fresh Coke.

Mike replied in his usual cheery tone "I need someone to help carry the tent!"

* * *

Dark clouds were gathering over Meteor Street, because pathetic fallacy is all the rage these days. Robin Grant walked up the path and pressed the bell for Daisy and Tim's flat.

He was nearly ready… he recited his speech in his head "_Daisy Steiner… will you marry me_?"

* * *

**Mwuhahahahahahhhargh ack cough chokes ... Please... reveiw... 'I need some water, Jeeves!'**


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